Chipklok
by Ex Axis
Summary: Toki has the last bag of chips that Mordhaus will have for about twenty minutes. And the rest of Dethklok doesn't want to wait for more. Oh, the tension.


Toki Wartooth was simply minding his own business, eating a bag of Doritos in the living room. No one was in there with him. He liked it that way. Toki had some time to himself to eat a bag of chips. The television was on, and he was engrossed in it. Some sort of program featuring people's weird phobias were on, and that fascinated Toki. He took another chip, and then he heard something on his left. He heard footsteps coming towards him. The curious Toki turned his head in the direction of the sound, and he saw Nathan standing in front of him. Nathan pointed to him and said,

"Where'd you get those chips?"

"Oh, they ams the last bag." Toki replied after swallowing his current mouthful.

"What? Last bag? Then you should tell the Klokateers to go get more," said Nathan.

"I dids. They said they'd be backs in about 20 minutes." Toki replied, fixing his eyes back on the television. He reached into the bag and took another chip out.

"That's the last bag we'll have for 20 minutes? Lemme have some." Nathan said sternly.

"Oh comes on. You can'ts waits for 20 minutes?" Toki retorted.

"Toki. What the fuck." Nathan said. "You're hogging them."

"Whats do I looks like, your youngers brothers who you bosses arounds all the times? Fuck no." Toki took his chip and promptly put it in his mouth. Suddenly, the sound of footsteps appeared again. Skwisgaar had entered the room.

"What's goings on heres? I heard fightings." Said the blonde.

"Toki has the last bag of chips, and he won't share any." Nathan crossed his arms.

"Oh, comes on, Toki. Shares it with us. Aren't we your pals?" Skwisgaar said in an upwards inflection.

"Nopes. You kinda treats me like shits half the times. So just wait the 20 minutes and you's can has all the chips you wants." Toki responded apathetically. He ate a chip, slumping down on the couch a little more.

"This guys is not even considerates." Skwisgaar looked back at Nathan angrily.

"I know, right? Look at that selfish little fucker." Nathan whispered back. "Hey. You. Share those fucking chips."

"Hmm...lets me thinks abouts it," said Toki with a sarcastic tone. "Nah." He continued to keep his eyes on the TV. This angered Skwisgaar, so he walked over to the TV and shut it off.

"Hey, what gives?!" Toki sat up, visibly irritated by the lead guitarist's action.

"You're nots the only ones who loves Doritos! Gives some to us, we're hungries!" Skwisgaar raised his voice a little.

"Guys, I can hear you across the hall. What the hell's going on here?" Pickles sauntered into the room.

"Toki won't share the last bag of chips." Nathan pouted.

"What? Not on my watch!" Pickles exclaimed. "Toki, come on, dude. Why are you doing this to us?"

"I says it a hundred times! The klokateers said they'd be backs in 20 minutes! It's been like 12 since then! Calms your tits!" Toki yelled.

"You're the one yelling here, so your tits clearly aren't calm!" Nathan replied.

"We still got 8 minutes of us being chipless! Come on, let us have some!" Pickles' voice started to sound a little whiny.

The familiar sound of footsteps echoed again, and then Murderface appeared in the room, agitated by the band's yelling. He scratched his head and began to question the uproar.

"Guys, why are we yelling at each other again? Didn't we have an argument over something stupid yesterday?"

"Looks at yourselfs, Murderface. You start shits all the times." Skwisgaar snickered a little.

"Yesterday I didn't!" Murderface snapped.

"Anyways, Toki has the last bag of chips we'll ever see for 8 minutes. The worst part is that he won't share any." Pickles explained.

"What the fuck?!" shouted Murderface. "Toki, I've heard of you being an asshole, but this is a new low! Why aren't you letting any of us have some?"

"Holy shits! Do I haves to keeps telling you guys to be patients?!" Toki yelled. "Here! Take your stupid chips! Like I care!" He tossed the bag on the ground, causing the other four to nearly pile on top of each other to grab it. Fortunately for Pickles, he was the one to grab it.

"Hey! I got the chips..." The happiness on his face soon faded as he realized what he picked up. "What the fuck." The bag was unusually light. Pickles tipped it upside down, and all that came out were a few crumbs. The silence in the room was so profound, you could hear a pin drop. After a few seconds, Toki started laughing quietly to himself.

"You smug little shit," hissed Murderface. "Did you eat them all before we got a chance to ask?!"

"No! He was eating them when Skwisgaar and I were in here!" Nathan shouted.

"I vote Toki for the most selfish bands members of the centuries!" Skwisgaar yelled.

"Oh comes on, stop acting like fucking babies." Toki said, annoyed. "You throw fits over everythings."

"So do you!" Pickles chimed in.

The room was suddenly filled with the sounds of yelling from every band member in Dethklok. Even Charles heard it from a few floors up, but he sighed to himself and buried his face in his left hand. They'd move onto something else later. The yelling continued on for a couple minutes, and then a voice that didn't belong to a band member came from behind them all.

"My lords." A deep male voice said. Dethklok turned around, to see about six Klokateers, arms full of bags of all sorts of chips. The chip piles nearly went past their heads. "We have returned with your snacks. Shall we put these in the cupboards?"

"Uh, no, you can just leave them here." Murderface said, suddenly calm.

"Very well," said the Klokateer. The men set down the piles of chips, creating a large pile on the floor. They all walked out of the room, and the silence returned again. Each Dethklok member except for Toki walked up to the chip pile, selected a bag, and sat down on the couch to watch the television. Toki stood up and walked out of the room in disgust.

"Drama queens." He said under his breath. The others heard him, but they didn't care. They opened their bags and began eating their own chips, watching the program Toki was previously watching.


End file.
